Worth Arguing About

Waiting For Superman may make you angry, sad or frustrated – if the state our our nation’s system of education hasn’t already done so -but it invites us to an argument worth having. Are we not the guardians of our future? Will we not want such a responsability placed in the most capable hands?

The question is not simply a matter of recalibrating the amount we spend per capita on prisoners and students. Rather, it is a matter of making education as profitable as prison construction.

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A Recipe For Happiness

Potatoes Urbina
One package Potatoes O’Brien
desired amount of pepperoni slices
onion powder, coarse pepper, sea salt and season salt to taste. Coat pan with olive oil and heat until water droplets dance on its surface. Pour potato mixture to cover one layer of pan. Add seasonings and toss until well covered. Allow bottom to brown to a crisp while pepperoni is wilting on top and Seattle’s Best Hazelnut coffee is percolating.

Turn with spatula once. Let brown while cutting an avocado for garnish.
Serve and savour. Give yourself brownie points if you can identify the
website on the screen in the photo above. Better yet, enjoy seeking
your own true north.

And remember what Oswald Chambers says:

My worth to God in public is what I am in private.

Not Quite Random Thoughts

As I cross the parking lot this evening at Food For Less and step up onto the curb, something about the waning light and falling temperature puts me in mind of the end of the world. My eyes caress the balding and straw-like patch of lawn as if these beginning/end of season blades of grass are the last on Planet Earth. I look up and catch the tail of a cloud, the bill of a baseball cap a stranger wears, and the scent of bleach and baked goods coming from inside as the electric eye opens the automatic doors…

After watching a dvd alone, you spent that time in the bedroom and scold me without even trying when I come to tell you that not wanting to have children is not as simple as you make it reinterpreting my answer to your trick question – when I come to tell you that it’s you I love and did not marry to be made a mother. As I take the dogs out one at a time, their last opportunity for the evening, I think to myself, perhaps even out loud, three thoughts: 1) You deserve more than a wife who does not care about being covered in dog hair when she comes to hug you goodnight. I will never be anything other. And, looking around at the recently lopped hedges, tennis courts with one good net, and lights that work on timers like those you find in a sauna or steam room, 2) This is the life I get for never using my imagination, and 3) God has so much more in store for me and this is it…

A statuesque black woman emerges from the pool as Pepper and I come alongside it earlier in the evening. Steaming toward the jacuzzi her feet seem completely indifferent to the 50 degree pavement. Some part of me wanted to be her…

An email celebrating International Disturbed People’s Day was waiting with this message:

Life may not to be the party we hoped for, but while we’re here we should dance.

One thing I have come to learn about myself is that when I begin administering exhaustion like a drug, something early and terrifying has been restimulated and I am self-medicating to avoid it…

Can one be credited with transparency if one is, for all intents and purposes, invisible?

Stepping Up to Humanity’s Challenge

Though I know we will soon meet, I cannot tell him face to face that my instinct, upon hearing an excerpt from one of his talks on TED is to protect him. It is an odd impulse from many angles. Yet, for my own sake, that which is past in me, and is therefore now far beyond the place of protection, perhaps always was, I will share his summary of the ubuntu philosophy he shared:

The only way for me to be human is for you to reflect my humanity back at me.

This I offer after a particularly complicated class on ending sexism. I have posted in my archive some of the details and asked the team members teaching to send me their answers to a classmate’s question: How does sexism affect you personally? These answers I will post on my website. The only explanation for the complexity I experienced today must be next level living.

After Reading An Email

I just want to stay home with my dogs and listen to the cars or the wind rushing purposefully by.

I write the following to the friend whose words brought me crashing back into contact with my would-be-writing-self:

breath-taking, ,
how can i go anywhere now
except back to the blank page
a life’s reply is the only response
respectful enough

did i mention i am launching an immigrant lit class for summer 1
then in class 16 weeks this fall
somehow, until now,
i thought i might be ready…to read…to cipher through
the sinews of such shared pasts
suffocatingly present

now
i am the one laid out
in need of some hand to hold